It's time to face facts...

...the truth of the matter is we are boaters, because we suck at the beach!  No joke.  We got up at the butt crack of dawn for the three hour trek to Miami Int'l Airport, providing there is no construction or traffic (of which there always is).  Mom made her way through the security check point, relatively unscathed, albeit a bit flustered in the process.  She called about forty five minutes later to say she finally made it to her gate- after three escalators, one elevator, and a train ride- whew!  It was a good thing she had more than an hour to collect herself before boarding. It was a direct flight. She made it safely home, and Stephanie was there to pick her up without incident!

Meanwhile, we were navigating our way through Miami traffic, making our way to South Beach.  We have been there many times, and have stayed in some pretty cool boutique hotels in the Art Deco district.  South Beach is famous for people watching, and watching people who are people watching!  We saw our fair share of ta ta's today, as per usual.  And we saw all of the buff handsome men who were with other buff handsome men, also as per usual.  It's South Beach; what more can I say?  The one thing I do love, is how international the scene is.  I counted at least five languages I recognized, and a few others I didn't.  Anyhow, back to the point of the matter, we suck at beaches.

Scene 1. It all seemed to start out ok, as we were enjoying a good read...

we enjoyed the scenery...and even a pleasant walk down the beach....

As we were returning to our beach spot, Donnie went in to the ocean for a 'swim' (to relieve himself :).
By the time he returned, the power of suggestion struck my one kidney and weenie bladder, so I strolled to the water's edge to also "see a man about a horse", or "pee like a herd of turtles" or "drain the lizard"...ok, enough of the euphemisms. You get the idea.  Let me begin by saying that I had on my sunbathing suit, not my swimming suit.  I got about waist deep, minding my own business, doing my business (I think- I really don't remember) when a gigantic wave hit me full force, sending me rolling end over end back onto the beach...with my top around my waist, and my bottoms down to my knees.  I'm choking, spitting, trying desperately to dress myself, when the undertow sucked me back out only to roll me some more, end over end, de-pants me again, and spit me back up onto the beach. Ridiculous.  I looked for my husband for a little help, but he was engrossed in his novel, as you saw in the first picture.  I had to wade back out in that mess to try and remove the sand from my ears, my nose, my hair (which was tied up, but I lost that, too) my everything.  I looked like a drowned rat by the time I made it back to the blanket.  He looks up at me and asks if it's time for lunch?  Hmfph.

Scene Two.  I make sandwiches; we're having a pleasant picnic at the beach...

Until I reach into the potato chip bag, and a seagull swoops inches from my face and steals my sandwich right out of my hand.  I naturally scream, then all h**l breaks loose as thirty more seagulls join the melee.  I was left with a half a piece of bread and a piece of lettuce.  Fine; I didn't need the sandwich afterall. My honey hands me a rice krispie treat, and I lay back to snack on it, all stealth-like, so the flying rats don't steal it, too.

Scene Three.  All h**l breaks loose for the second time, in a wicked downpour.

The beach clears out, people are running for cover, umbrellas are flying in the wind.  I say, "Screw it.  I'm not leaving."  Besides, I needed to get the sand and salt rinsed off of me.  After a good 15 minutes of hard, cold rain, (this was no sprinkle) the sun peaked out, just enough to dry our bodies and warm us back up.  Nevermind our blanket, towels, and everything else we had with us was soaked.  Just as I am no longer dripping wet, and my fingers have thawed, I look out on the ocean only to see another front getting ready to move onshore.  For the second time, we say, "Screw it." and we packed up, and headed for the car.  We suck at beaches.

Only the plus side, we scored at Divers Direct for three items on our "to get" list, and we had a great meal at Cracker Barrel.  On the return trip back down Highway One, we had a God moment today. It was a Celestine Prophecy kind of moment.  I cannot give the details away, as it really isn't my story to tell.  But you know how when something happens, that leads to something else, and there is this string of coincidences and connections, that leaves you realizing that this was much bigger than some mere coincidence to begin with?

Yeah, it was like that.  A perfect God moment.

And we pulled into Banana Bay just in time to witness the second
 perfect God moment of the day.

So, I have already washed and dried the soppy, salty, sandy mess we trucked home.  I put the groceries away from the Super Walmart trip in Homestead, and let a Willis out for his nightly prowl with the riff raff.  I watched Survivor tonight, only to be disgruntled, embarassed, and disgusted by this pathetic tribe of women they have this season.  Don't get me started on THAT.

Tomorrow the hubby is going fishing, and I am giving Marquesa a thorough scrubbing.  I cannot wait.  No seriously, I cannot wait.  A clean smelling and organized boat = one very happy First Mate :)  We are having a fish fry neighborhood party with the folks on Angler Drive at 5:00pm.  Things are looking up; no beach tomorrow for me!

G'nite y'all :)

seeing green

It was my momma's last day here in paradise, though I must say, by the weather forecast it looks like she is flying home to a pleasant early spring in Indiana.  She sorted through and packed her bag (and a box for me to mail home!) and then we decided it was a perfect day to enjoy the sunshine by the pool.  We both got some more color today, for sure. 

After we got cleaned up, it was time for a refresher course on FB :)

The mighty fisherman grilled brats for us tonight.
He did catch fish today, but they went into the
freezer for the fish fry planned for Thursday :)

We had to pause putting dinner on the table, so we could
watch the sunset.  Mom had a front row seat.

We see private jets fly over several times a day here in the Keys.
There's lots of money down here, no doubt.

Getting ready for another God given, spectacular show.

beautiful...it was looking to be a green flash kind of night.

amazing...

...and though I didn't capture it, in the final seconds, before the sun
appears to sink into the ocean, it was a GREEN FLASH night-
the first of the season...you could hear cheers all around!!!

THERE WAS NO BETTER WAY TO END MOMMA'S STAY IN THE KEYS.

Poor Willis

We have been on the go so much lately, Willis was getting testy this morning.

He's taken to flopping on the dock so passerbys will feel sorry
for him and give him belly rubs.  He knows how to work a crowd.

When he tires of that game, he waits patiently by the 'door'
for Mom and Dad to come home.  Poor Willis.

Or he flops in the cockpit where we nearly step
on him as we come and go.

Dad promised him guitar lessons this winter, but he has yet to deliver.

Dad is trying to make up with him.

Poor Willis.  He's so mistreated.

We spent the afternoon by the pool...some much needed down time.

The boys club- no girls allowed.

Yay, Mom won a round of dominoes!

Biddi was a little frustrated here (insert bad words)

And then there's Fran, the winner/loser :)  Sandy was the winner/winner!

Introducing Captain Matt- CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

Meanwhile, back at Marquesa, Willis fell asleep patiently waiting
on Dad for those guitar lessons.  Poor Willis.

Animal Kingdom

Sunday was ridiculously busy...we don't let any sea grass grow under our feet around here...no sireeee.To church, the Hurricane for lunch, to the Stuffed Pig for the Pig Races, and to the Dolphin Research Center for the Annual Members Only party.  What a blessed day!  So many pics to fill y'all in-

We were going to pedal, pedal, pedal our clown bikes to the pig races, to
work off some of our lunch.  It was not meant to be.  Mine is a very sad
 and rusty clownbike, and Donnie's had a flat- it wouldn't hold any air.
Clearly, we are not using our clownbikes enough these days.

The gang is all here; we've placed our bets and are ready for some pig action!

Frannie is taunting Ken; we'll see who has the last laugh.

Who's got the winning ticket?!  The pig.

The first two races with 6 mo old piglets were over in quite a hurry.

Let's just say the pot bellied pigs needed LOTS of encouragement.  The final
race was dubbed, "The Race We Hope Are All Losers." And the pot bellied
pigs were aptly named Obama, Pelosi, Biden and ???
 (I can't think of the last Democrat's name :)

The Number 3 pig lead the whole race...in the final turn, the #1 pig, named
Obama, was making his move. (insert cheering, screaming, crowd noise here)

The #3 pig (our bet) gave out at the finish line.  He drug his sorry a**
as far as he could, as fast as he could, until he collapsed at the finish line.

Look who's smiling now!  I'm thinking this is one of the few times
you'll see Kenny give a thumbs up for Obama, lol.

I won a stuffed pig and a pig puppet!

The winner's circle!!!   Let's see....who's absent...hmmmmm????

After all the fun and games, Mom, Fran and I went to the Members
Only Party at the Dolphin Research Center.

Where we got to see the dolphins up close and personal.

This boy was flirting with me and waving :)

So cool how they turned to look the people in the eye, and smile :)

A few weeks ago, overnight, the boys broke through the gate into another
pod of four boys....it's been one big frat party ever since.  Some had scuffs,
scratches, bite marks and sores where they've been rough housing. 
Such typical boys...too testosterone-y for their own good!

Hi Jax! You can always tell which one is Jax.  He was a rescue
dolphin when he was found with his dorsal fin bit off by a shark. Stupid sharks.

Its such a shock to see them pop straight up out of the water for a look-see.

It was nice to get close and ask questions.

Molly and Aleeta are gearing up for the finale.

Wave 'hello' to the crowd, girls :)

There they go!  The music started and dolphins were
flying everywhere!  They seemed to love the music!!

Each time Tursi jumps, she squeals!  It cracked me up....reminded
me of the piggy in the commercial "Wheeeeeeeee!!!!"

Yay!

Do not be fooled by these pics- I had a dozen dolphin splash photos.

Only DRC dolphins tail walk, and it's a behavior they taught each other :)

They really put on a show today.  It was awesome!

Goodbye y'all :)